Collapsing Eventualities.

Well, I said I'd edit my last post, but I decided a new post would serve better.

What happens when your life takes a break for about 2.5 years and suddenly rushes back to you, like a dormant volcano violently awakened? Chaos? Confusion?

Surprise?

Not really, but it seems, at least that I have a massive lifestyle adjustment on my hands. A lifestyle borne by necessity and enforced desire, not of freedom. Jik talks about how his life is going to end, but that's because he's the eternal hedonist. What I am, I'm not so sure, but I have heard tell of "masochist".

Perhaps I am? But i prefer to have some pressure on me at least. It's my way of staying connected to reality. My way of finding a direction in this world of possibilities. Maybe thats the stirring of the volcano, but maybe the reason the last couple years was so aimless and almost..pointless, was because there was no breaking pressure for me to move my pistons, just a slumbering desire to be doing something, anything, significant.

To be sure, I have not been doing absolutely nothing, but to finally be at a stage where what I do now will deeply impact the next stage in my life...feels exhilirating. An adrenaline rush. But it goes deeper than that. The collapsing eventualities of the last few years, the culmination of reawakening, a deep frustration, desire to move on, and the result of many events have finally returned to me something I have needed sorely.

A purpose.





The Shining Path and the Road Behind.

Well, almost at the end of my long brain-vacation. Trying to WD40 away all the rust has so far proved to be a exactly, if not exactly fruitless task. Still, holding high hopes for SMU to reactivate my disused grey matter.

On a side note, 4 day week , with Monday off, good gracious.

Edits to come later.